Your Next Bold Move: A visit to righteous babe records

Ani DiFranco singing "Your Next Bold Move" at the 2003 Philadelphia Folk Festival

When I was in my late-twenties I had a nervous breakdown. I drug it out over a few months, self-medicated, got my hands on some good books, played music and managed it somehow.  Toward the end I was able to meet some important mentors who taught me a lot about the world. Learning all those lessons missing from church, school, college or any other institution where adults have to pretend as if they know how the world really works. It is a tough job when the world is so complicated.

I had started a business right out of college (graduating in 1993 having never taken a single business class). Two friends and I started a business doing publications for the tourism industry in Charleston. We threw a ton of energy and time at it. I was young, poor and had nothing better to do. It kept me out of trouble and helped me learn that rejection and failure were temporary. Some of the publications worked and we found freelance business as I trotted around to countless seafood restaurants, tour companies and art galleries. 

As the web came along we became infatuated with the possibilities. We started designing web sites, creating reservation systems and doing e-commerce in 1995. I remember standing in my office the day Netscape 1.0 came out and being drunk on possibility. It was a unique way to learn about the “real world” -- At the exact moment everyone insisted the rules were all going to change.

I went to bed one night after working until 3 AM. Half from exhaustion and half in some hope for a future I was just beginning to conceive as an adult, I wept with relief that I had been born in such a time of possibility. Never doubt the power of naivety and ambition when mixed in potent doses.

I certainly believe we live in a more self-determined world now and that gives me hope. Sure, corporations control most everything in the practical world and guys who like to blow things up control the dominant paradigms of life. But really, who cares? None of us should feel guilty for not being able to change that. Honestly, I don’t know that I have the energy or talent to do any better. I am just glad I can make it through the day sometimes, so don't ask me to fix the problems in the middle east.

I don't feel like I have any more chance of crashing into geo-politics than I do  being hit by a truck. Both are possible, but if we spent our day contemplating all the bad things possible, none of us would get out of bed. I can't change what culture finds valuable. I have decided that trying to solve that problem in the abstract is a waste of time and energy.

During fireworks shows at Joe Riley stadium (we can hear them from our house) I don't have to worry if those sounds may mutilate or kill me or my family in a matter of moments. In some places of the world, I know that is not the case.  I take my blessings without the guilt also.  But the next time you hear fireworks, think about it. It is sobering.

"Joyful Girl"
ani difranco

i do it for the joy it brings
because i'm a joyful girl
because the world owes me nothing
and we owe each other the world
i do it because it's the least i can do
i do it because i learned it from you
i do it just because i want to
because I want to

Our recent Hurricane Katrina Media Tour visit to Ani DiFranco's Righteous Babe Records brought back a lot of emotions for me. The web sites and tourism publication business we started failed. Eighteen hour work days, passion and vision are not enough to make a business succeed. We got in over our heads and learned a valuable lesson in overhead control. I remember once, unable to pay the bill, having the electricity at my apartment cut off; yet going into an office where we had a dozen or so Macintosh computers for graphic production, scanners, a conference room and 8 employees. I knew something was completely wrong. Leaving that business was the hardest decision I ever had to make, but I did it and life moved on.

Soon after, a friend loaned me $500 and I took a drive that kept me on the right path. Three weeks out west visiting old friends, snowboarding, hiking; really kicking it old school. It was magical. On that trip I discovered Ani Difranco. That was the fall of 1998.

everything i do is judged
and they mostly get it wrong
but oh well
'cuz the bathroom mirror has not budged
and the woman who lives there can tell
the truth from the stuff that they say
and she looks me in the eye
and says would you prefer the easy way?
no, well o.k. then
don't cry

When I encountered Ani I said - here is a person who is being honest, singing her guts out and somehow I discovered her in the dessert of Nevada (on a bootlegged tape I am ashamed to say, though hopefully I have made it up to RBR over the ensuing years). She sang to me almost constantly from Nevada to Mississippi and it changed my life in a very positive way. All the good stuff comes from a friend or a chance encounter.

A year later I had another moment sitting in the bedroom of a cheap apartment I was renting. The same friend I had been visiting in Nevada returned to Charleston and had a new tape – “The Past Didn’t Go Anywhere”, a compilation between Ani and Utah Phillips a folk storyteller from California. He put it in and we sat silent in my bedroom for the entire tape. I was blown away at the creativity and power of the mix. Straight from an artist's head to my ears. And again, thanks to a thoughtful and important friend.

While at RBR we got to hear the story of how Ani and Utah met from her long-time manager, Scot. Ani was invited to a folk festival shortly after she had shaved her head. All of the younger artists shunned her, not understanding why a hippy folk singer just beginning to build a name for herself, would make herself look like a skinhead. Not Utah. At 70+ years old, he and Ani hit it off. He heard her the naive and powerful spirit in her music, didn't give a damn about her image, and a friendship formed.

The problem with Naivety is that you can't fake it or will it into existence.  The universe won't allow it. Not the case with ambition, where self-hypnosis, training, delusion, fear, insecurity and any other number of standard human practices can fuel our drive for something bigger, faster, better, more pure. Even when we know it is essentially senseless. Ambition without naivety is a more dangerous animal. Waking up every day facing the world fresh, despite everything telling you to be cynical and crafty is hard. I wrestle this demon every day of my own life. But at least I am allowed to compete. And sometimes I can win.

and i wonder if everything i do
i do instead
of something i want to do more
the question fills my head
i know that there's no grand plan here
this is just the way it goes
and when everything else seems unclear
i guess at least i know
i do it for the joy it brings...

Art and artists save countless lives every day. They add such a lubricant that the value of what they provide to the social, industrial and economic machine cannot be calculated. Without them most sane people would quit and give up. You would be hard pressed to find anyone who cannot tell a story of a book, a song or a movie helping pull them through a difficult time in their lives. If you do find someone who can't relate to that experience at all, my knee jerk advice is get away from them as fast as possible.

It is at these moments of intense inspiration that I wonder how we can create a system that  recognizes the value true poets and artists provide.  Do we buy more of their stuff? That just does not seem like the complete answer.

Thanks to Ani and all the people who helped get her music out to the people who needed it. Her strength and right intention has inspired tens of thousands including me.  I have found a different canvas, but hopefully on my good days it is the same spirit.

What I hope to add to Xark is to tell the stories of people who inspire(d) me and give me more than I could ever give back. Thanks for inviting me to be part of this community.

Comments

[jmsloop]

Hi Mithcell and greetings. I look forward to your stories and thoughts with much anticipation.

[Daniel]

Welcome to Xark, Mitchell.

By way of introduction, Mitchell is a musician and tech/media/commerce pioneer, cofounder of Booksurge, cofounder of Organic Process Productions, and an idea MACHINE.

[Stephanie Robinson]

The site is looking great. I especially like your Low country links.